I am going to actually start posting on here (: I’m starting over! This is me.
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all my life, i’ve never really felt accepted. i have always felt judged by others, regardless of how close i was to them. thankfully, i can now say that i have a person in my life that i can confide in anything with, and tell my darkest secrets to. Mary Rose, i know you’re reading this, and i want…
Yesterday I did some seriously deep thinking. My mom recently told me, “Live in the moment Mary, enjoy whats happening now, stop worrying about the future.” Although, its nothing too thoughtful, nor intriguing, it started a thinking storm. I guess you could say that my New Years Resolution, is to live in the moment of now. There are times, were we have to plan ahead- things like college, or surprise birthday parties, but sometimes we need to take a step back, and look around, see whats happening. I’ve started to do this, and- if nothing has changed, I feel like I have. It is seriously benefiting my mood. Another thing, that has been beneficial to me, is controlling how I feel, and not letting other people. I would literally let the actions of others decide if I was going to be happy or not. Not anymore. I’ve decided to be happy regardless, if my bestfriend is having a crappy day or if my crush texts me back, at all. Only I can decide how I feel, and its been really awesome. Depending on how I feel, dominoes, what I do, say and act around people too. I believe that I am becoming a better person for this. I do understand, that I won’t always be happy, and won’t always have the strength to smile, but I’m sure as hell going to try my hardest, to be the happiest person I know- Regardless of others.
Christmas is suppose to be about God. Christmas IS about GOD. But so much crap has gotten in the way of it. Commercialism. Christmas is suppose to be about a peaceful night. A night when God decided to give us all a second chance. Instead of shopping and spending a large sums of money on materials. Instead, we should be using this money to buy toys for the kids who have none. Or help a cold homeless friend out of the winter snow. I know that I’m going to make it, my personal goal this Christmas to help remind people of what Christmas really is. Not Santa, the lights, the gifts or Egg nog. But our second chance at living, for eternal life. Thank you God <3 :)
